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9:00 PMSad News
Hey there everybody.
I'm making this post because I recently lost a family member. While I am sad about it, she lived a very long life (104, although she's documented as 102 because she made herself younger when she immigrated to America) and I wasn't especially close to her.
But it solidified the fact that I have lost like 1 person a year since I was in 8th grade. Like that's ridiculous. It's been way less then those who were genuinely close to my mom who have died in the last year alone. Then again, she is getting up in age so that could be why.
I don't know. It's just very odd. So I'm writing this to remember them.
To my auntie who died in September of 2010, during my 8th grade year, of cancer she didn't tell us about because she didn't want us to worry and cared enough to console my mom in her grief when mom found out.
To my digital photography teacher who was the sweetest person and was always joyful even when the topics got heavy who died in December of 2012, when I was a sophomore, because she wanted a picture of the trains. An additional note: earlier in the week she died, she said she wanted to die doing something she loved, so my first thought upon hearing she died was "How did the pictures turn out?"
To one of the religion teachers and robotics coaches I had during my sophomore year who made so many people happy who committed suicide in December of 2013, my junior year. I am so sorry you struggled with depression and it got that bad. I can't imagine being there when it happened (I had moved at this point) because it was so quiet when my photography teacher died I imagine no one talked that day. I don't know. What was the weather like also? The day we came back from the weekend with my photography teacher, it was foggy that morning and all you heard was soft crying and incredibly quiet mumbles all through campus. There was no doubt more crying and it was probably quieter.
To the cheerleading coach I only briefly saw but knew he did so much and had a large impact on the school who died early 2015, when I was a senior. You're so wonderful to have forgone chemotherapy because you wanted to be with the kids you taught. I saw the impact after where everyone who was close to you smiled although they looked ready to cry.
Finally, to my great-aunt I only ever called auntie, who had been saying for many many years her time was coming, who gave me money in typical Filipino fashion (giving it to me, I say no you keep it, they push it further to me or stick it in my pocket after a while. Very kind but I always feel guilty for taking their money), who always cried and said how you were the last after my first aunt who died because all your siblings were long gone. You were so stubborn you lasted this long. In the end, you got a lung infection and that did you in but you lasted so long with a pacemaker. And you looked no older than 80 always, even though in the hospital and old person's home you only had a hat and your tattooed eyebrows instead of your nails painted and hair permed.
Thank you all for touching me in my life. Thank you so much.
WELP that was heavier than expected. My apologies!
In any case, that's all for now. I'll write one more post before the month is up, I swear!
See you everybody! And thank you for taking the time to connect with me on this deeper level.
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